Confidence is something that is easy to talk about and pretty difficult to actually obtain. I’ve heard the full range of opinions on how to gain confidence. Some people say that we just ‘need to be ourselves’ while others suggest we lose a few pounds and buy some new clothes.
I’ve tried both of these suggestions and many others but I’ve found that only God’s love gives me the real confidence that I need.
I discovered this truth from an unexpected area of life; rejection. In the words of the great Andy Mineo, rejection feels like you’ve been kicked in the midsection. That phrase does a good job of summing up what it feels like, BUT when we recover from that pain we can find this incredible source of confidence.
I say “can” because many of us continue to carry our rejections with us and they still haunt us to this day. That’s a tough place to be in because the longer we go without dealing with rejection the harder it becomes to face. Each time I got rejected I had to lean into it and take the hit right on the chin.
While it was not fun at all to go through that pain, I did come out on the other side and now the idea of rejection does not scare me like it did in the past.
In the past, rejection terrified me because I thought it showed a personal lack of worth. That perception really didn’t change until a few young ladies turned me down for no other reason than the fact that they didn’t want to date me. Each time this happened, it felt like the floor dropped out from underneath me.
Then after a few minutes a surprising realization dawned on me each time; I still knew that I was loved and that I had worth.
I still knew that God loved me and that love had formed this kind of foundation. This foundation sat below all the other things that I though gave me value and that’s what I landed on when the floor came out from under me. I didn’t really know the power and value of that love until it caught me like that.
I knew at that point that God’s love would be there for me no matter the circumstances. That truth gives me a confidence that far outmatches the false confidence that comes from nice clothes or a good haircut. Those things might help us get a date or a job, but God’s love will hold us up even if we don’t get either; that’s real confidence.
I don’t need to get confidence from something that might give me an edge on the competition or put a little swagger in my step. I need a confidence that lets me know that I can survive rejection or failure. The kind of confidence only comes from knowing that an all-powerful God loves me and will stick by my side no matter what.
Image Copyright: Erica Zabowskiby